In an attempt to do some mental spring cleaning, I signed up for one of those free, 21-day meditation ‘journeys’ with Oprah and Deepak Chopra. Each day I log in to receive positive messages, launching me on guided meditations to relieve stress, shed excess weight, and find inner peace. Here’s the thing: I have been doing these for years, and it always ends up the same. Yes, they are helpful for centering, becoming aware, and being mindful; but something always seems to sabotage my serenity.

For instance, this morning, before anyone is up, I tip-toe downstairs for my morning meditation. Plopping myself on the couch, wrapped in a soft blanket, my earbuds engaged, I begin the podcast. Oprah starts  each session with a centering thought. Today’s is “I am living the way of peace.” I chortle reflexively. With three teenagers and four pets under my roof, my life is anything but peaceful. Nevertheless, I try to turn off my cynicism and simply listen.

The message is to find fulfillment by looking within and to radiate peace. Deepak’s soothing, velvety voice shares the day’s Sanskrit mantra to chant silently; Om Shanti Om; or, I radiate peace.

So I get all comfy, relaxed. I’m in the zone, for about 5 minutes before I hear a bell jingle. Now Deepak knows we all lead busy lives filled with distraction, so he proclaims during each session, “Free your mind from any noises or distractions by repeating the mantra.” So I ignore the jingle, and I whisper to myself Om Shanti Om, and I try to be peaceful when suddenly I feel a form pressing into the pooch of my stomach. Hello, kitty! Even Deepak can’t drown out this purring beast who began kneading the very bane of my existence; the gift I blame on my children; the awful 13-year-old baby fat that he finds necessary to “bring into my awareness” at this very moment. I pause, and wonder, what would Deepak do? He does not offer words of affirmation regarding probing pets.

Folks, this is the story of my life. I try to take care of myself and be healthy. But in the end, too many people and animals depend on me. (Kitty’s best friend is my 75 lb. Golden Retriever.) No, I did not punt the pussycat. I continued listening to the tape with eyes wide open, contemplating my many layers of motherhood. I chose to radiate peace and irony, showing gratitude for the lesson of the day: despite all of life’s distractions, in the long run, it’s nice to be kneaded.

Here is the link to the site.  https://chopracentermeditation.com/resources

 

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